Time Capsule | 2017

02/01/2018

annie spratt

Look who's late to the party. I didn't plan to write a 2017 recap so I guess this isn't much of a yearly review. I think it's better to consider this as a bunch of realizations and lessons learned mixed with bits and pieces of reviews here and there.

Private life


Since I'm a very private person and I don't like talking about depressing real life situations on my blog, let's just cut the chase and say that 2017 was a landslide to my soul. There were good things as well but most of the time I spent at home was wasted on frustration, bad things and emotionally toxic people. If you're not comfortable reading about personal struggles, you might want to skip this part.

+ Got my current job as UX designer in a startup design and software studio in May and was pretty excited when I first started. Months later, however, was an emotional roller-coaster ride between wanting to quit but unable to (because finding a job ain't easy!) I still feel pressured and on the verge between quitting and not quitting but we'll see how it goes this year.

+ I felt like over the months, my design thinking has improved quite significantly. I'm not saying I'm a super awesome designer (at least nowhere near) but I certainly felt that I can now brainstorm how to design better. This is essential because as a user interface designer, my concept has to work for the people.

+ I was diagnosed with vaginal yeast infection. It sounds gross because it was. I was prescribed itraconazole, a medication for fungal infection and have sworn never to wear skinny jeans anymore. I never knew what I had was an infection. I thought it was a normal discharge but nope, it wasn't. I have sworn not to wear skinny jeans and tight fitting underwear any longer!

+ I had HPV vaccination last year and.....medical bills suck. Fortunately I'm done with it. My obgyn told me that the best age to get HPV vaccination is before you reached 24-25 years old because the older you get, the less effective it will be.

+ A major downfall for the relationship between my father and I happened this year because ugh I don't really wanna talk about it but let's just settle down with how patriarchy and man-ego makes me want to barf so bad. On the other hand, I seemed to get along better with my mom. I've never had the best relationship with my toxic family and I still fight with my mom from time to time but 2017 made me realized a few things, making me appreciate her more.

+ There were other things that happened to my life in 2017 but I don't really feel like recalling them so let's just move on to the next stage.

Socializing & Internet


+ Major highlight in 2017: internet drama. Unfortunately it happened and not just once or twice but multiple times. Someone accused me of glorifying my depression and mental illness because a). I disagree with her opinions regarding the tv show 13 Reasons Why and b). because unlike her, I do not seek help from a shrink. For the record, I don't avoid shrinks because I think it's cute to be anxious and depressed — I have other personal reasons that I don't like to talk about publicly. Still, that person was being unfair, stupid and a waste of my time.

+ I thought about quitting blogging and the internet as a whole. I end up going against it though. Why, because I still love to write and I forced myself to ignore the people who disagree with me as long as I don't attack anyone. Also, the comments I got on that post telling me to continue blogging kind of made me think "well yeah, I should keep this blog up. I've gone this far, can't stop now."

+ The internet made me realized how much of a hypocrite we all are. We talk about freedom of speech and expression yet we do not accept differing opinions that counter our arguments. I learned this the hard way on Twitter. It's such a major lesson to take in but it was worth it.

+ Lesson learned: trim away the poison edges and let yourself grow. 2017 taught me how to say "enough is enough" and walked away from the toxic folks. The year taught me that it's okay to defend myself when the other person makes me feel like I was being manipulated. I'm a slow learned but I learned how to let go and things have been better ever since.

+ Following Hannah's advice on the benefits of digital detoxification, I made up m mind to use twitter and facebook less. Less internet discussion, less stress. Less internet stress, more free time to explore myself, my hobbies, etc. Win-win solution. I logged out from my facebook app and I don't check twitter that often anymore and it has been days (weeks for facebook) now. I'm going to continue with this 'therapy.'

+ I've been trying to shut myself up from talking or discussing about sensitive (read: political/controversial) topics on twitter because the activists there are insane. Like I said, they talk about freedom of speech but they can't even accept the fact that people carry different opinions.

imagine this:

me: I don't like avocado

twitter activists: oh my god you're such a bitch for thinking that avocado lovers are garbage!

me: (((rolls eyes to the moon and going blind from it)))

kari shea

Perks & Projects


+ Luna, Hannah, Becky, and Grace are some of the coolest people I've met in the blogging community and I'm so thankful for them. I don't know what they think of me and I know I can be a little shit sometimes (if not most of the time) so the fact that they haven't walked away from me is A+ right there. So, so grateful for them tolerating my bullshit okay.

  • Hannah is awesome and obviously the community knows who she is. If you don't, you are missing out because she. is. hella. amazing. I am a huge fan of this girl. No, seriously. Read her blog, read her book, stalk her even lol jk and you will not regret it.
  • Luna is a cinnamon roll that I want to eat. She is such a chillax person and that makes our conversation really enjoyable to have. 
  • Becky is extremely creative when it comes to art and beauty. She was the one who inspired me to wear more colors when it comes to makeup. She was the one who made me fall in love with colorful makeup. Such a cool individual!
  • Grace. We've known each other for what, a year? I forgot. But I remember the first time we talked was on her blog's comment section.We've had little moments where we almost got into this awkward "are we arguing?" situation but I still think she's a fun person to talk to. Plus, it's so much fun when we talk about how screwed this country is.

Of course, there are other awesome blogs and bloggers I discovered in 2017. I want you to know that even though I forgot to mention some names here, I still appreciate all of you for giving me some time despite my trash personality, heh.

+ Hannah reached out to me in 2017 and offered me a position to be part of her project, the Wild At Heart Edit. I was so, so surprised and totally honored to be part of the creative team. If you check the 'about' page, you'll see that I'm the graphics designer and creative editor of WAH. As of now, Hannah and I have been emailing each other back and forth regarding the theme, visual aspects and guideline for our upcoming first issue.

Good things


  • I took breaks (read: leaves) from work when my body called for it. My supervisor probably thought I was lying for having such a weak physique (and that made me feel like it was so unfair and shitty) especially when aunt flow cramps started kicking in. Here's another reason why I feel like my work environment is starting to treat me like a tool. 
  • 2017 was the year for skincare splurging for me. I bought the Cosrx low pH gel cleanser, the travel size 60ml Son & Park Beauty Water and The Ordinary Azelaic Acid Suspension.
  • Okay I lied. I also bought some Colourpop stuff because they were having a buy-one-get-one promotion in December. I'm still waiting for my stuff in the mail, yikes!
  • I bought my first and second eyeshadow palettes in 2017. They're Morphe 35F and Colourpop's Yes Please palette.
  • I splurged on quite a lot of things in December as an excuse to gift myself. I'm still waiting for some stuff in the mail before posting a whole post dedicated to my haul.
  • Buzzfeed Unsolved was definitely my 2017 obsession. Can't wait for season 3 of True Crime and hopefully, season 4 of Buzzfeed Unsolved Supernatural.
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Movies


I'm just going to cover some highlights and not all the movies I watched in 2017. You might want to check my Letterboxd account for that.

  • I'm using my Letterboxd account to backlog movies more frequently!
  • 5/5 for Disney COCO which, in my opinion, is one of the best animated films I've watched in 2017. Disney has done it again! Okay now give me a Monsters Inc sequel.
  • 4/5 for Thor Ragnarok; really easy and simple plot gloriously saved by the amazing directing and cinematography. What a fun ride!
  • 3.5/5 for Justice League. Imperfect and totally flawed but I love Barry Allen and Wonder Woman so.... It could have been so much better though. I'm still gonna root for the sequel.
  • 4.5/5 for Blade Runner 2049. Highly recommend watching the prequel first though.
  • 4/5 for War for The Planet of The Apes. Go Caesar!
  • 4.5/5 for Wonder Woman. Haters gonna hate so leave me be.
  • 4/5 for Fantastic Beasts & Where To Find Them although I disagree that they cast Johnny Depp as Grindelwald. Seriously though? Do better.
  • 5/5 for Logan. This is the kind of X-Men movie we all need.
  • 5/5 for Arrival. This is the kind sci-fi shit that I need.

 2017 Realizations


  • When things don't work out between you and the other person, walk away. If possible, be civilized and say that you've had enough toxicity, enough emotional frustration. No one is forcing us to love anyone and everyone.
  • Anxiety is a b*tch but to judge it from a different perspective, it actually taught me certain things that change my view towards the world.
  • All the lifestyle changes I did when I should have done them sooner. But better late than never, right?
  • Mute notifications, log out from them if possible. Do not scroll down and back-read tweets and/or statuses!
  • Things to do to prevent mental combustion.

Additionally, my boyfriend bought The Elder Scrolls Online for me and we've been playing it ever since. I've been into Sims 4 again too, thanks to the latest vampire and cats & dogs DLCs.

+ I finished reading 15 out of 20 books for the Goodreads reading challenge. Most of the books I read were young adult dystopian and fantasy fiction. Major shoutout to Leigh Bardugo's Six of Crows for being one of the best 2017 read ever.

+ Speaking of books, boyfriend bought me the Six of Crows duology for my birthday present but I don't think I'll read Crooked Kingdom in 2018 because I don't want the duology to end so fast! I am obsessed with Bardugo's Grisha universe.

+ Took a trip to a contemporary art museum with boyfriend and our friends. I'm not a museum kind of gal but it was a nice experience.



Some people carry expectations and resolutions on what they wish to do in 2018. I personally don't because resolutions tend to not work out and expectations are risky. Why stress myself by having expectations when I can lower my standard and not be surprised if the year disappoints me again? I know, I know. I'm such a depressing person, ain't I? Can't help it since I'm a pessimistic realist. My 2017 probably felt like nothing but a gloomy recap compared to those who had theirs in a very uplifting and productive manner.

Regardless, fingers crossed to all of us.

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